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Men Made Easy Preview
Read Chapter One

How you can make your dreams come true.

Why men need to feel successful.

Why you have the power in your relationship.

Why men are driven to make women happy.

Why a defensive man cannot love.

Why men are willing to face rejection.

Why men crave intimacy more than women do.

Why men are so cautious about commitment.

How most men express intimacy.

Why men need concise communication.

Why monogamy is so difficult for men.

Feminine Grace and Intuition:
Without them the Twelve Simple Secrets won't work.

How you can make your dreams come true.

Once upon a time there lived three fair maidens who had all seen a wee bit of life, which probably means we shouldn't be calling them maidens, but hey, this is a fairy tale. These particular women lived in a picture-perfect village on the edge of an enchanted forest as, of course, all forests are.

Many years ago, no one quite knows how it started, a strange malady befell the women of this village. It caused them to let go of their dreams, to be less than they thought they would be, and to make excuses for why their relationships were not as they'd hoped. Everyone accepted it as inevitable. The villagers called it The Settling and it wouldn't go away.

These three women had been friends since childhood. Carol, with long auburn tresses, was the oldest and most experienced at the wise age of forty-one. With big brown eyes, high cheekbones, and a smile that never stopped, she was instantly likable. The others looked up to her because she had been married twelve years and had two small children. Carol had owned a successful dress shop but was now enjoying being a full-time mom. Her marriage had fallen short of her girlhood expectations, but she figured it could easily be worse. Although her marriage had begun with lots of love, over the years her husband had become distant and unexpressive. She missed the way it was. Carol was aching inside but didn't know how to change things. She numbed herself by staying busy with her children and her friends.

Jenny, at thirty-nine, was the next oldest. She had fiery red hair and freckles to match. She was a strong, outspoken woman and worked as the assistant manager at the only bank in the village. She'd been divorced six years ago and only recently gotten married to the man she had been living with. She had wanted to start a family, so she persuaded her boyfriend to get married. Now she was worried because they seemed to argue all the time. She wanted him to be more attentive and romantic, but whenever she mentioned the subject, he just walked away. Their resentments were growing.

Finally, there was Beth, who, at the tender age of thirty-five, was the baby of the group. She was the perky type, with a peaches-and-cream complexion and long golden curls. She had always struggled with her weight, and after her most recent breakup, she'd gained even more. She managed the village bookstore. Her third serious relationship had recently broken up and she was beginning to wonder if she was ever going to find the right man. She worried that maybe she was being too fussy.

Carol, Jenny, and Beth made a point to get together every Thursday for lunch. They'd seen each other through the ups and downs of life: marriage, childbirth, boyfriends, breakups, and divorce. You name it, at least one of them had gone through it. Probably not so different from the life you share with your girlfriends.

One day, during one of their weekly get-togethers, they began to complain--again--about their husbands and men in general. They dissected every nuance of their relationships, their disappointments about love and romance, the bits and pieces they felt they understood about men, and what had gone wrong along the way. Their conclusion? Men were lame, insensitive, and boorish, and whatever was going on in their thick heads was beyond anything they could figure out. As with everything else that wasn't quite right, they blamed it on The Settling. But no one ever had a solution.

Carol, even though long married, spoke with frustration. "I feel like I'm always groping around in the dark. Thomas seems so close-mouthed and if I try to talk to him about it, he clams up even more. It's just not worth the headache to care."

Jenny agreed. "Yeah, I try to get Brad to be more romantic, to talk to me more, but it's like I'm talking to a brick wall. It's easier to just let it go."

Beth frowned. "What I don't understand is how, after only a few months with a new man, he quits doing all the wonderful things he did in the beginning of the relationship. When I find Mister Right, I want him to adore me forever." Her eyes got misty. Their waitress, Ginger, an irritatingly gleeful type, had been picking up bits and pieces of their conversation and, having waited on them several times in the past, was familiar with the women and knew this was usual conversation during their lunches. Ginger decided to be bold and say something. "I'm sorry to butt in, but I can't help notice that you talk about men a lot, and it doesn't seem you're that happy with them. Do you mind if I make a suggestion?" The women, although instantly defensive, agreed to listen to her.

"Obviously you like men or at least want them in your lives, but from what I can tell, you're stuck and don't know what to do to make things better."

As you can imagine, our friends stared at this snippy little waitress with a look of What could you possibly know? But, curiosity being the powerful force that it is, Jenny spoke up. "What on earth are you talking about?"

"I've been visiting a woman who lives in that cottage on the edge of the forest; you know the one. She's teaching me how to transform my relationships with men into golden opportunities of happiness," Ginger gushed. "This woman is teaching me how to turn what I thought were mediocre men into absolute princes. I'm having the time of my life, and so are the men. The Settling is gone from my life and I'm more optimistic than I've ever been."

Beth, with a youthful streak of optimism, spoke next. "Ginger, if what you're saying is true, I want to know about this woman. I still have my dreams and I don't want The Settling to take over my life." Ginger, recognizing a sister rebel, continued. "This woman will teach you her Twelve Simple Secrets about men. The Secrets could have helped me avoid a lot of heartache and helped me turn at least two of my past relationships into 'happily ever after.' It breaks my heart to think about it. But things are already looking up and I'm excited about my future. "Diedra, that's her name, welcomes anyone who's sincerely interested in turning ordinary relationships into exceptional, lifelong love affairs. After hearing what she has to say, you'll know things about men that even men don't know, and certainly more than almost every other woman on the planet. Then you'll be able to cast a magic spell over just about any man. It's powerful stuff and works almost instantly. It's fun to fool around with because men are simply thrilled with what you're doing even though they don't have a clue that it's going on. They just know that all of a sudden you've become irresistible, they can't keep their minds off of you, and they're dying to make you happy.

"Once you know her Twelve Simple Secrets, she guarantees your relationships will become truly magical. You'll experience lots more love, romance, and even steamy passion, if you want it. And Beth, since you're single like me, there will be a terrific man in your life in no time. All this because of the Secrets and because you're going to learn what it really means to be a woman. I know because that's what's been happening to me."

Ginger, like a conspiratorial missionary, looked into the hopeful eyes of the women. "You've got to trust me and at least meet her."

Carol was the most wary. "This just sounds impossible."

"Don't you want your relationships to be better?" Ginger pleaded. "Don't you want to know what life could be like without The Settling?"

"Men have always been the same," Carol argued. "I can't believe things could change just like that. As for The Settling, we've lived with it all our lives."

"That's just it." Ginger was excited. "It hasn't been all your lives. Think back. Remember when you were young girls? You dreamed you would some day meet a wonderful man who would want to make you happy and cherish you forever. You dreamed you would be the fair maiden, blissful in your life with your prince."

Ginger could see a deep stirring within the women. "Can you remember how it was? The Settling hadn't taken hold yet because you still had your dreams. And don't you remember the hopes and dreams you had when you got married? You don't have to accept The Settling, and men really can become princes."

"I still have those dreams," Beth said, "but with each year and every man that passes by, I become more disheartened. I'm beginning to think that all men are inconsiderate, selfish, and insensitive." Beth twisted her napkin.

Jenny's voice was a whisper. "I had those dreams when I moved in with Brad. But day-to-day life took their place. I'm beginning to not care anymore. Even the fighting has become routine. But my dreams of romance, enduring love," she looked up hopefully, "of having a soulmate, have just drifted away. It crept up so gradually that I never noticed. What happened? We were so in love in the beginning."

Carol had to reach farther back, but she agreed. "My life with my husband and children is so busy with work and family that all those dreams are just a flicker of memory. I think about them once in a while and I feel silly. You know, just schoolgirl stuff. That's not real life. Thomas is a good man, but he's so distant. Sometimes it doesn't even feel like I'm married."

Ginger smiled. "I like you ladies. I've heard your conversations about men and I thought the same thing.until now. It doesn't have to be like that. One of the women in my group had the same kind of husband. As she learned the Secrets, she came alive as a woman, and her husband began to notice a happy, attractive woman around the house. As she began to love herself, she felt more sensuous, sexy even. When he began to show some interest, she happily encouraged him. She says they're like newlyweds."

"Almost every man can be a prince." Ginger's voice rose with enthusiasm. "If you still love your husbands, even if it's a tiny bit, Diedra will teach you how to turn them into the princes of your dreams." Ginger leaned close. "And they'll love all that you're doing. Honest. The beauty of the Secrets is that they make men fall madly in love with you, even if you've been married for years. And if you're single, you'd better know what you want in a man because you'll have more than one to choose from." Jenny's curiosity was growing. "What kind of things does Diedra teach?"

Ginger thought for a moment. "Well, have you ever wondered why men quit being romantic, why commitment is so difficult for men, why men don't listen when you talk, why sex is all men seem to think about, why men seem so insensitive? Or have you wondered why men won't talk about what they're feeling, why passion goes away, why good men are so hard to find, or why it's so darned difficult to understand men?" They waited, hanging on her words. "Well, the Twelve Secrets will answer those questions. You'll understand men so well it'll seem like you're looking directly into their hearts and souls. You'll actually understand them better than they understand themselves. When you understand men that well, you'll know exactly how to turn your relationships into your fantasies come true. They'll begin to change in ways you've always wanted and start treat ing you like a queen."

"I don't know," Jenny said. "It sounds like we're supposed to become docile, mindless, adoring wives."

Ginger laughed. "Hardly. It's the complete opposite. It's about you becoming totally awesome. For the Secrets to be most effective, you have to admit to being, and want to become, the terrific women that you were meant to be. The more empowered, self-confident, and happy you are, the better the Secrets will work. Come on, there's nothing to be afraid of."

The three friends looked at each other with a What do you think? twinkle in their eyes. Could men really change that much? They were curious, and very tired of The Settling.

They asked a few more questions; then Ginger made a comment that convinced them. She said, "It can't hurt to try it, and if you don't do something different, why on earth would you expect anything to change? If all you do is complain and accept The Settling as inevitable, your lives will continue to be the same." Beth pleaded with her friends. "The 'same' is what we've been getting for a long time, and, admit it, we're all tired of it. Doesn't magic and dreams coming true sound a whole lot better?"

Then Carol said, "Okay Ginger, we'll do it. Sign us up." Jenny and Beth smiled with the excitement of a new adventure.

One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea.

    ~ Walter Bagehot

When asked what she hoped to gain from one of my MEN MADE EASY seminars, one playful attendant said, "I'd love to have a fairy godmother who would wave her magic wand and make my life perfect." Maybe you've wished you could get exactly what you wanted by wiggling your nose like Samantha in the old Bewitched TV series. Magic can happen, but it's up to you to create it. For years, we women have wished our relationships with men would be different, but we never knew what to do. As you've learned, wishing isn't enough. With the Twelve Simple Secrets, you'll finally know what to do. Your relationship will begin to take on a new life, sparkling with the love that you enjoyed when you first met.

The secret to change is to do something different.

With this book, you hold in your hands the opportunity to completely transform your relationship. You will become your own fairy godmother and finally make your schoolgirl dreams come true. If you want to be happy from within, and have your relationship become more loving, romantic, and even passion-filled, the Twelve Simple Secrets are what you've been waiting for.


3 things you can do:

At the end of each chapter you'll find suggestions for things you can do to transform your relationship and take charge of your level of happiness. The more you do, the more you'll learn about yourself, and the more effective the Twelve Simple Secrets will be.

  1. To begin the process, get a three-ring binder and some lined paper to keep your notes in.
  2. Then write down five things you want from your relationship that you don't have now or don't have to the degree that you would like.
  3. Now, write down just three things you'd like to improve with your husband or boyfriend during the time you read this book. If you're not involved with anyone, do this with men in general. You can do it in the form of journaling or lists, whichever is most comfortable for you. Just play with this and be curious. You may learn something new and interesting about yourself.

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Not Just Another Relationship Book
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Men Made Easy
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What Readers Are Saying
See what others have to say about Men Made Easy. Hear how it's improving their lives and their relationships.

"Where was this book 20 years ago?!!! If my wife and I had read this book a few years ago, the 'journey' would have been a lot more fun. Now we're learning how to make up for lost time."
Harry Anhard (El Paso) ( July 29, 1999


Radio Interview Schedule
Kara does several radio interviews each week, all around the country.

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Kara's Book Tour
Kara is on tour with her book several times a year.

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Helpful Articles
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Books to Help You Grow
You'll find titles that are from Kara's library, many of which she used in her research for Men Made Easy.

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Belle Expressions
© 1997-2000 by Kara Oh
All rights reserved

Updated: March 27th, 2000

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